Had a great day today, went to Straits Restaurant@Hyatt for a farewell meal as one of our colleagues are leaving. Very authentic Straits Chinese food, and all Halal!
Rushed back to school for Mark 8-16 Bs after work, was 30 mins later and essentially missed most of the study itself. Was feeling moderately sick, and felt like skipping it, but heck, just whack painkillers and go for it. Thank God, the next 1.5 hours was worth it, EVERY MINUTE.
Today's application: How do you know when something is God's will for you and when is it just your own pursuit of a dream? Must we always NOT strive to become a top banker/lawyer.. etc... in order to obey God's laws? Far from it!!! It is sheer ignorance and stupidity to hold such a notion without understanding the Godly principles and the process which will lead many of us to our first job. This is not an easy to understand or appreciate, so let us do so through further analysis
1) Principle: Putting God's Will before our own: Process: Very often, we decide on one thing, and then we pray/work towards it. It might sound perfectly sensible, but doesn't it also sound like you put your own agenda in the center and then try to accommodate God around it? Will God be glorified in the process? Lewyn said to asking what God desires for us, and with that hope, work towards what we think God desires for us. Which leads to another question, how do we know WHAT God desires for us? I do not have a good answer for this, all i can quote is Mark8:36 ; What good is it for a man to gain the whole world yet forfeit his soul? I feel that the only way we will ever know what God desires for us is by building a faith small as a mustard seed but can move mountains.
2) Further Analysis: Some of us feel that we can handle both, that we can build our career ladders and our spiritual walk/serve God side by side. Well, such a thing comes 2 ways. First, the number of hours your job consumes, and assuming that the work hours are demanding, whether you have the capability to multi task and serve both areas efficiently and effectively. Let's be frank. If you work 100 hours a week ( which i have tried and nearly fainted), its gona be pretty hard to teach the children on sunday. Of course, no harm, you can try, but just like blackjack in a casino, the odds are highly against you.
In conclusion: I'm beginning to realise that serving God is not trying to stuff Him into my plans, but rather surrendering my plans to Him and letting Him become my decision maker? Will that lessen my determination at all? Hardly, infact, i think it makes me even more determined to do well so that He may be honoured through my labour. Nonetheless, its a great struggle at times, and frankly there are times that i SO SO BADLY wan to give up and say 'screw it'. But i believe its the right step to take, that focusing on God is the most important, and that he will provide sufficiently for me and my future family. I still have doubts about future, how am i going to provide for my family after 45, whether i must become a rainmaker to hedge against such a problem, and if i become a rainmaker, will i end up compartmentalizing God...Its so many decisions, but i realise, just TRUST God and pray that i will continue to work my keep and strive well to honor him no matter what. And never give up on allowing Him to make decisions for my life.
Ok, that's it, Good night ! =D
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